New month. New challenge. New Me!


Yo yo yo.

How you all doing?
I’m feeling fan fucking tastic today and I don’t mind admitting it.
Today is day 15 of my juice reboot and I SWEAR not a morsel of food has passed my lips.
I feel great, I haven’t had a hive outbreak for a whole week (A urticaria miracle) and I have energy like a toddler on speed.
Mind you, when it comes to dinner and preparing food for my family, I do tend to go a bit wobbly.
Something about preparing food, fragrant aromas washing over me as I slice, dice and simmer mean that by the time I set dinner on the table, I suddenly feel like a sasquatch on the verge of a rampage.
Not a good look.
But the good news is, I’m half way through this juice shit. Only fifteen days to go until I get to eat solid food.
It’s amazing how cravings turn around in just two weeks. Instead of fantasizing about junk food, I’m now champing at the bit to get my hands on a big juicy salad. Hopefully that feeling lasts!

So now it’s June and time to get started on a fresh challenge. To compliment my juice reboot I’ve decided that this month, my goal is to workout everyday. It’s been a goal of mine to get fit for a while. At Christmas I joined a gym. Then I went to the gym a couple of times, by myself. I hated it. I couldn’t stand it. I felt awkward, gawky and WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED to all the young people in the gym? They rock up, dressed in designer gear, with their fake tan and boobs and work out like crazy.
Granted, they have amazing bodies, but they have faces like smacked arses…what’s the deal with that?
I also couldn’t get my head around how the gym is heaving with sweaty bodies, but every just ignores each other.
It makes me anxious.
So four months after joining the gym, I was barely using my membership. It turned into one of those things I’d say I would do, but then would fuck off completely as soon as a more interesting proposition presented itself. (And that included housework). Then I would feel like a total failure for not going.
Then my friend, Alison joined the gym too. Everything changed. Now going to the gym is actually fun.
So now I know: I need a gym buddy. I need accountability. I also need to fucking laugh at the gym… because what’s the deal with everyone perfecting the bulldog chewing a wasp look? Did I miss that memo when I signed up for a membership?
So that’s my June challenge…anyone else want to join me?

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